This great Nor’easter of 2017 is here. 70 million people are in it’s path. Blizzard conditions are affecting 9 states. 6,000 flights have been cancelled. Up to several feet of snow. Ice everywhere. As cold as 14 degrees. And I am in my flip flops heading to lay out on the beach.
I survived the Great Nor’easter of ’17, by Living in Florida.
One of Floridians favorite past times is needling your old friends that live in the cold parts of our country. We Love it. It is almost as good as going to the beach!
Honestly we love it. It’s one of our little guilty pleasures.
Maybe it’s because we miss you and wish you would move down. Maybe we just want you to suffer. One will never know.
1st things 1st. Post lots of pictures of your beach and sunny days and umbrellas and cold drinks.
All of your friends on social media will have to click on it and reassess their life choices. hahaha!
Of course they love to see those pics. Obviously if they choose to live in that climate they are gluttons for punishment!
Post your Beach pics.
Use visual comparisons.
Our winter shoveling vs. theirs. How we use salt, how they use it.
Do not be afraid to make it abundantly clear that they have made some wrong choices in their life when it comes to living arrangements.
Post memes to rub it in.
Utilize national weather maps to illustrate your comfort and their suffering.
This is a very important point. Use a reputable source to back up your claims of warmth and splendidness. It’s 3x more painful if they see confirmation from an outside source. 3x!
Florida maps, National Weather service maps, The Weather channel, they are all great sources of fuel, I mean information.
Use Weather maps.
Use your screenshots of the weather app. Works every time.
There is not one among us who hasn’t figured out how delicious it is to post a screenshot of your own weather app and comment about how chilly it is in florida lolol!
“Guys be sure and bundle up today it’s down in the low 70’s!”.
“Omg! I just had to pull out some socks it’s so chilly here today!”
“I’m not sure how I can go to the beach today it’s so cold.”
You get the idea. Weather app screenshots are great fun.
Make it abundantly clear the level of comfort you are currently in and your excellent decisions in geographical life choices.
A final plea to our Northern friends that they can live better. They can live in the warmth of the Sunlight.
They love to see that. It gives them hope that there is a better choice. A better way of Life.
I don’t really see our taunting of our Northern neighbors as a bad thing, I prefer to think of it as a long term intervention strategy to help them move to a warmer climate and enjoy the rest of their lives next to the beach, ocean, palm trees, seagulls, dolphins, and good good times.
So, make sure you do your part and share your pics, statuses, stories like this with all your people and one day your cold shivering friends will thank you over a beer on a florida beach somewhere!